Wednesday's Rantings: Trying to find a day off....and figuring out what to do with it.

Hello folks!
Well, I'm late posting....again.  Part of it is procrastination.  Part of it is because I'm not a fast writer and I quite simply Don't. Have. Time!

I've tried setting aside a few hours of my free time to write for my blog and update my sites, but it's hard!  Being a self-employed dance teacher means that I'm responsible for my own schedule, and since my monthly income depends on getting as many private lessons as possible, my schedule becomes very irregular from week to week, so I frequently end up with much less time to blog than I originally intended.

I know, I know, I should just say "no!" to some appointments, but I gotta say, I like having money!  I like being able to pay my bills and have a lot of money left over for the inevitable tax return that I have to fill out, which will tell me that I owe the IRS money in the 4-digits range.  I like the feeling of success and the knowledge that I have students who think I do a good enough job that they want to come back.  This month has literally been the most successful month I've had in a while.

The erratic schedule of the past few months is taking a toll on me, though.  I looked back through my calendars, and I've discovered that I have been working every day since March 1st!  I've been dancing for 5-10 hours each day, every day.  The only day that was kinda a day off was last Friday, and that was only because I had one private lesson.  The lesson still broke my afternoon in half, though, and I still had to dedicate 2-1/2 hours of my time to said private lesson, so that really can't count as a day of relaxation.

Thank God Saturday doesn't have anything scheduled.  I checked, and once I saw it was clear, I made sure no appointments would be made that day.  I have a day off this Saturday! Whoo-hoo!!!!

God, I need a break.  I apologize to those who are reading this (especially if any of you are my students), but I felt like ranting a little.  I put myself into this insanity and now I'm facing the consequences.  I'm doing a good job, and I love it, but I'm exhausted!  I'm starting to feel a little more introverted and anti-social now, which is unfortunate because I need to be a perky, energetic person for my job.  The past couple of days have especially hard; it's just so difficult to keep smiling and stay positive for the sake of your students, when all you really want to do is go home, lie down on the couch with the cat, and do things that don't involve talking to real people (besides your husband, of course).  It's even harder when you feel so tired and frazzled that you can't remember what you did the last time you worked with that student, and you're feeling frustrated with, and distracted by, your memory loss.

I ended up playing hooky tonight instead of helping out with the group classes like I normally do (it helps when the owner of the studio is your mother).  I just felt like I couldn't focus clearly on the dancers, nor could I bring up enough energy to talk to them and socialize, and just be nice in general.  I had a feeling that I was going to have to fake a whole lot of my behavior tonight, which our studio's dancers don't deserve, so I decided to just go home and recuperate.  So far, it feels like I did the right thing, because now I'm starting to relax a little, and I feel like I can get a good night's rest tonight.  Plus, I get to catch up on my blogging!  Yay!

So now that I know I'm going to get a whole day off this Saturday, what am I going to do with it?  I have no idea!  The important thing is that I have nothing that needs to be done, and no place I need to be at a specific time.  My biggest fear is that I'm going to waste the day on a T.V. binge; an easy thing to do when you've got Netflix.  What I hope to do though, is to go for a walk (if the weather is nice), listen to some more Harry Potter with my husband, read a bit, and just catch up on things that I haven't had the time to do lately (such as clean the friggin' apartment!)  Here's to hoping that this little spot of optimism will come true!

Well, I'd better stop for now; the laundry needs folding and the bed is saying "co-ome to meeee!" (talking inanimate objects--first sign of insanity. Crap.) Have a good night everyone!

-Lisa The Dancing Bookworm

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What I'm Currently Reading

Nobody's Fool
tagged: currently-reading and literature
Uncle Tom's Cabin
tagged: currently-reading, classic, fiction, and literature

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